Did you grow up in a family where yelling was the norm?
Was love conditional? Did you always have to strive for it?
When things went wrong, was someone to blame for it?
Or, did talking not take place at all?
When you grow up in a dysfunctional family, you may have not realized it. It becomes your norm. If you never experienced a healthy family, it can be hard to know what your doing well, and not so well. Here are 5 signs of a healthy family.
1. Clear Communication
When problems occur, the family comes together to solve this issue. Individuals clearly communicate how they feel, taking responsibility for their behavior. With this, each member of the family has opportunities to express. In return, responses of support are given in return to what is being expressed.
2. Spending Time Together
Healthy families make an emphasis on carving consistent time out for one another. This includes special time for husband and wife. At other times, the whole family does activities. And parents taking individual time with each child can be an excellent way to support a child emotionally.
3. Handle Stressors with Ease
Families can deal with many different stressors. Healthy families respond by not blaming others. They look for solutions to the problem. Recently my son has had trouble sleeping. He was struggling with nightmares and wanted to have a light on. We would leave the hallway light on and he would wake up frequently during the night. After a few sleepless nights, we found a light bulb that didn't disrupt the production of melatonin. Successfully restoring sleep to the house!
4. Boundaries
As parents, there are certain topics that shouldnt be discussed around kids. This helps to limit exposure and allow them to be a child. If hear arguments going on, talks about divorce, children can often take a view of blaming themselves. They may feel that they are at fault.
5. Unconditional Love
Doing things for one another without expecting anything in return. It is normal to have disagreements in families. To be angry or frustrated your child is, or isn't doing. What's important, is to separate the behavior and the support you give. When children act up, it is a time to support.
Hopefully this helps in create a life full of love and support! Remember, it takes time if this is all new for you. Seek out healthy families to see what they do. Seeing it in action is a great way to learn!
Casey D. Bearss, MA, LPC, NCC
Casey Bearss is a counselor who is passionate about helping create change in other lives. He belives everyone has the ability to create a beautiful life! He helps clients create positive beliefs, new habits, clear communication and loving relationships. Casey moved to the Gulfcoast with his wife and three boys to create his version of a beautiful life. He is the owner and licensed professional counselor at Bolt Counseling Services in downtown Gulfport, MS. To link to Casey Google +.
